Tourniquet

Questions.
Sydney.
eBay.
Friendster.
Retrospect.

What have i been doin? Where am i headin to??
Sometimes, reflectin on the situations i'm in, i do not know whether to thank God if tis path was beautifully made or should i be worryin that i might juz end up in disappointment & regret. Quarter century yet here i am, jobless, tryin to get motivated to soldier on to prepare for my test and upcomin exams, while others are buildin up their careers, savin up money for the future.

I suddenly miss the little luxuries that i used to be able to afford n pay for myself. Even buyin myself a dress seems like a guilty indulgence with what lil money i make from some dance classes before the school holidays kicked in. Did i make a wrong move by quittin my full-time job and layin low as a part-time/freelance employee at such age? Would people employ me, an older graduate compared to the young ones, who are wide-eyed, brilliant & motivated?? Been browsin n tryin for new job opportunities in my specialised field, usin my Diploma qualifications, so far no response. It's worryin, probably bad timin too.

I've always been optimistic abt things, confident of my decisions. But when the thoughts of livin on a budget n lookin at others travellin the world, workin with the Big Wigs, man i feel so minute, so inapt n doubts start to creep in my head.

This is, if God wills, my last semester attendin lectures in school. I HAVE TO put an end to this slack mannerism & PUT IN THE DAMN EFFORTS to EARN grades, it's about time i get SERIOUS instead of remainin frivolous, goin with the flow. I want a good future career & MONEY big time. I cannot afford anymore time loss n seriously i need a Drive.

Wise up & Get Organised, It's not too late!
God, hold my spirit high...I need ur Salvation...in tis path less travelled that i have chosen.


Oh Btw, CONGRATS MESYE for the Good News. I'm Proud of U~