Tuesday 10 October 2006

HTML & My Natural Charmer-A Lil Pointer for the Boys


HAHAHAHA i sniggered & laughed as i read tis article below...it even triggered me to sms somebody!
Cos...ok...i'm gonna share with u a lil secret that i have kept even
from my
bf. it's only today, till i read it that I suddenly felt that somebody
finally put words in my mouth n i
could nod and understand what the heck makes my bf so irresistably
charmin to my sick lil heart. shit, he's a natural i tell u, i can't help but be drawn towards him.





(i noe u gonna be readin tis mesye, and how u r gonna put on that sly
smile when u read, and how u r gonna tease me abt it...oh fuck how i
feel so threatened right now, but dammit i can't deny it, the case is
true.)





my dearest contacts, if u can't stand my love love bullshit, u betta
stop readin till -right here- before u purge
blood/food out of every pores on ur body.


if u wanna learn a trick or two to strike some chemistry with ladies or
ridicule my crazy cuckoo feelings or go woozy with me, i welcome u.


BUT WORD OF CAUTION: Tis might not be applicable to ALL ladies ok. hahahah!!


From the Life section of today's Strait Times

Oct 9, 2006
Do you speak caveman?
I'm learning html - no, not the software code but short for How To Meet Ladies. And it works
By Jeremy Au Yong, straight talk


MY GIRL problems are over. I've finally worked out where I had been going wrong.
All
this while, I thought being fat and balding was my main problem. Talk
about barking up the wrong tree. I was wandering around the wrong
forest.

No, my major flaw was being nice. Too nice.

You
see, whenever I was attracted to someone, I had this bad habit of being
nice to them. I would shower them with attention, take them to nice
restaurants, buy them nice presents and generally be all attentive and
caring.

My thinking was: 'If you like someone, you should be
nice to them and show them you care. Then they may appreciate your
affection.'


I realise now I was a fool.

Women don't
want to pampered - at least not in the courting stage. Pampering them
is about as attractive as scratching your bum in public.

Women want to be treated badly.

I
chanced upon this revelation in a book called The Game written by Neil
Strauss
. In the book - a true story - he tells the tale of how he
became the world's greatest pick-up artist.

Anyway, one of the main mantras expounded in the book is to 'be the prize'.

He
tried to shroud this line in some mumbo jumbo about self-worth and
confidence but, in practice, what it boils down to is: Ignore the girl,
criticise her and punish her for mistakes.

Ignore her: If she is in a group, talk to everyone else. Pay her no attention whatsoever.

Criticise
her
: Cut down her self-esteem with little insults like: 'Nice hair, is
it real?' or 'You have a really cute smile. Your crooked teeth really
add character.'

Punish her: Don't let her play hard-to-get. If
you try and put your arm around her and she pushes you away - turn
around and talk to somebody else.

Of course, the book is by no means suggesting that simply ignoring, criticising and punishing will make a woman like you.

Don't be silly. You've also got to lie, manipulate, give her cheap jewellery and treat her like a child.

Essentially, he says, anything that worked when you were a kid - stupid magic tricks, personality quizzes - still does.

The
book also has tips on opening lines, how to disarm resistance, how to
invite her home and even a trick to associate positive feelings about
yourself with a cheap necklace you give her. He's boiled it down to a
science.

It's great stuff. I gobbled it up.

Eager to test out my new-found skills, I went to a bar with a friend after work one Saturday.

She
introduced me to a group of her friends seated around a booth. I
smiled, introduced myself and zipped off to get some booze. I was going
to need some courage.

I returned and found an empty seat next to a young girl with a chin stud. She would be the one.

I
started sipping my jug of Long Island. For the next 15 minutes or so I
spoke to my friend, and some of the others who had wandered off the
dance floor - but completely ignored her.

When I felt she was feeling sufficiently left out, I made my move.

I turned to her and started with a conversation starter I had memorised.

Me: Hey, can I get a female opinion on something.

Her: Hah?

Me (yelling): I would like to ask you if I could get a female opinion on something.

Her: HAH?

Just my luck. The house band had just started their next set and was playing at max volume. I couldn't hear a thing.

Time for plan B.

I
took out a business card and held it in the air. After a little
rehearsed showmanship, I made it disappear and reappear again. (It was
a trick I had learnt when I was a kid.)

That seemed to work.
She went and got a friend to come and watch. I did it again. There was
an obvious impressed look on their faces. Yay.

I walked away
to the dance floor, minor victory in hand. A little while later, she
joined me. I couldn't believe this stuff works.

When it was time for me to leave, I gathered my stuff and waved goodbye.

She waved back, smiled and said: 'Bye, Magic.' There was definitely some chemistry there.

Okay, so that was the only thing she said to me all night (I blame the music).

Still,
for me it counts as an unequivocal success. (I count all instances
where they don't run away screaming as unequivocal successes. Those who
run but don't scream are considered 'good efforts'.)

I am convinced that if I had not forgotten to ask her for her number that night, she would have given it to me.

Since then, I have helped a friend get a girlfriend using these same tricks so I feel certain I've cracked the code.

I intend to take it to the next level.

Start
learning off the Internet messageboards, read more books on hypnotism,
learn more magic tricks and maybe even join the local community of
pick-up artists. I don't know yet.

But one thing's for sure: No more Mr Nice Guy.

jeremyau@sph.com.sg

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

U seduced.
U intrigued.
And U dropped me like a sack of potatoes!
But hell, i'm hooked to ur bait!
Ur nonchalance,
Juz blow my mind!
And u dun even realise it, how sweet.
U feed my inner desire,
U fulfill my basic need.
To bring out my Strength & make me feel Glorious.
All tis while, all tis time
I am so glad I have U & U r Mine

Eh mesye, but dun deprive me of some tenderness & some "manja"ness eh! please hor, i want those too! warrior princess need TLC also.hahahahah!
















32 comments :

  1. Hahah u are so right!!
    Hmmm and i wonder how come i only manage to "hook" u ah!? Maybe i should try "broadcasting" to a wider range eh...Hahaha

    P.S: I love you too...


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  2. awwwwww...love's definitely in the air..hahaha..n there's some truth in the article ar..but still, i dun want my bf to be mean to me..i want him to treat me like a princess...hehe

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  3. wow..Tough Love is the new Romance =)
    I wish u lovebirds bliss and happiness =)

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  4. Ahakz~ It's true... the chinese has this saying "Nan ren bu huai, Nu ren bu ai"... errr... Literally meaning "Boys not bad, Girls not love"... But I've had enuff of my fair shair of tough guys! They leave a very bitter after taste... Eeerks.

    I'm happy with sweet mushymallow lurve now. =)

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  5. wah wah wah....ni de hua yi zhen hao ah!
    cute!!

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  6. Muahaha.. Mr Rosswaja, what u have to say about this???

    To sophie: Well, now we know why we kena bully rabak-rabak.. Hehe...

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  7. eh eh....broadcast wider range eh?! punch u then u noe ah!
    hahaha!!

    P.S.: aishi teru, honto neh (^_^)

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  8. Like dat u will get bored of it ah...LoL

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  9. And malay got this saying...."Jgn dengar banyak sangat bualan org cina"....LoL

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  10. there'll be bound to be cat & dog fights, smashing plates and glasses quarrels, trust me.. else its not love.. ;o)

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  11. to iyuan -> ahh ok..maybe i shld treat him like a king sometimes to be fair..
    to hafiz-> i know..the fights will make the bond tighter and an interesting one, just like a rollercoaster ride.. =)

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  12. interesting funny article..but yeah doesnt applies to all ladies..=)..good to know at least some people out there are truely in love...and loved...

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  13. pepatah dari mana pulak ni??? hahaha...

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  14. i'm begining to think the love bugs must have been working over time... so many people seems to be having "love is in the air" moments.... and i am too!!!!!! woo hoo!! hehe

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  15. hahaha!!
    heyy it's infections are wayyy better than flu bugs!

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  16. haha... ok fine to a certain extent there's a bit of truth in this. reminds me of all the IRRITATING messages on my pager and the MSG BOMBINGS sessions when YOU know i was in class! haha.... dun gimme that innocent look mr fyz!!!

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  17. hehehhe...and more love story unfolds? what u have gotta say, mr fyz?

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  18. Uhhhh.. say wat? Too much coins in my pocket lar.. So.. yeah.. Outside lecture theatre ade public phone per..

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  19. Being too nice, people will step on your head. On top of that, you seem fake. So guys, just be yourself. It would be great if there's some mind games involved during the courtship. Haha. But don't go overboard by being rude in the ignoring, criticism & punishment. Some gals may not like it. A tip, if you wanna manipulate & tell lies make sure we dunno you're lying. Some guys sux at tat. Great turn offs!

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  20. Ni pepatah yg telah patah eh? Tak pernah dengar pun...

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  21. I concur!! Dah lah tak pandai tipu nak tipu. Eeerrrkz!

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  22. Muahahahah!! Jgn tipu dgn penipu!

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  23. LMAO!!
    yeah yeah i agree!
    don't EVER be rude, NEVER.

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  24. Hey hey hey...this is copy-righted eh!

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  25. Baru jugak ah kluar, semalam agaknye...oh bro kau dah naik jadi ustaz eh? aku tak dapat pon pulut kuning...

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  26. hehe..tak tahulah dari bila entah jadi ustaz. pulut kuning tak ada...bubur masjid banyak..haha
    my tafsiran for this article: jahat ke baik ke...kalau tak ada charm, memang sah tak akan dapat anything. ensure she is as an audience to your show. you can be the biggest baddest arsehole, tapi kalau tak ada orang pay attention, waste time ajer.....paham??? you have to remember this is all JUST A GAME......

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