In comes the sms-es, a song even courtesy of Miss Rafeeqah. My birthday is always a deadline for things and it also means that half of a year has gone.
A reflection on how my life has evolved, twisted and turned since i turned 25 made me realise how life is so intricate and in-ur-face that dealing with it everyday without seeking the Grace and Mercy of God is really quite impossible. My last birthday is still vivid in my mind, the Terperanjat Beruk moments, the Anna Sui makeover, the Kaki 5 chill out, the Kate Spade drama and the World Cup/Superman affair...i had major fun then! Then comes January, where fear, jitters and struggles started to steal away some of my fun, in which my late dad was hospitalised for hernia when i had to leave for Australia. The pains of leaving loved ones to pursue my dream made me wonder if i had made the right decision yet i carried on, thinkin of them n havin them in my prayers everyday at the same time experiencin and adaptin a different lifestyle in a foreign country. So far the first half of 2007 has been a real learning, eye-opening, mind-bending, tough decision-makin experience and life has not quite been as tralala-goin as before. Never have i been challenged so much in dealin with life's obstacles, one after another they escalate, whereby the latest of course, is work & probably my mum's condition. Never have i felt so much pain to such an extent that i juz wanna clam up n hide in my own shell (trait of a Cancerian?) Yet here i am, goin on 26 in age. Maybe it's a process of makin me a lil bit more mentally matured and emotionally sensitive...or be more responsible towards my loved ones, perhaps?
Friends asked me what i want for my birthday. The only desire I had for the past few months was this: "Peace of mind". And it's comin true! Alhamdulillah. I am finally able to breathe a lil easier now and hopefully those storms in my head will subside and that sunny days will shine upon me soon. Despite of all the setbacks, mistakes and obstacles, I shall keep on movin forward, lookin ahead, makin decisions with no regrets with the guidance of my Lord.
July looks more promisin...A graduation, a resignation and a birthday celebration. It's time for joy to take over...and it'll begin later TODAY. Lookin forward to my lil birthday rendezvous in the gardens...*sheepish smile* it's sweeter if i can be walkin & twirlin around on the grass barefeet! Ahhh i'm so ready for that~
Blessed be, everyone & have a lovely week end!
